As readers of this blog know, I’ve given a couple of Way Opens readings; although the Q&A sessions were pretty lively, these readings were pretty old-style. Former teacher that I am and, believe it or not, actually not all that comfortable being in the spotlight (Really!), I’ve been wondering if there weren’t a more interactive way to talk about my book.

On Monday, June 30th, that interactive way just sort of happened. The incomparable Bob David had invited me to give a reading at the Side By Side meals and sharing program in Jamaica Plain. After a delicious meal (thank you, Kevin!) and the announcements, Bob invited me to begin. I’d noticed that the sharing circle rug, chairs, candles centerpiece, etc. had already been set up, so on the spur of the moment, suggested we sit in the circle. (For more about sharing circles, both JP’s and FMC’s, see the last chapter of Way Opens) The candles were lit, the sage/cleansing ceremony began, and then I read two passages, having offered the group a couple of things to listen for (which I don’t think I’ll do again). After each passage, using the talking piece, the multiracial group talked about race, White privilege, “showing up,” their own experiences, gratitude, forgiveness; quite a rich array!

Looking back on Monday night, there are things I wish I’d done better. But  the sharing-circle format is definitely a safe, intentional, all-opinions-matter way for people to talk about some really hard stuff.

Do I dare to bring sage to my August 12th reading at Porter Square Bookstore ?

Because 2 of the men from Friends Meeting’s meals-and-sharing circle were graduating, David, I and three others from the circle went too. As had been predicted earlier in the evening by Cambridge’s mayor (Denise Simmons; she’s impressive!) and others, the speeches given by each graduate after he’d received his certificate were powerful, tear-producing, amazing.

What struck me was the same thing that struck me when I taught homeless students: How much  having a spiritual life plays a leading role in recovery, survival, making it. “God put some beautiful people in my life,” the first graduate stated. He was followed by graduate after graduate thanking God, asking for a moment of silence, etc.  

Years ago I was asked to talk to Harvard Education School students who were taking a look at why some students hang in there and others just give up and fail. When I mentioned my observation that homeless students who had some kind of spiritual life seemed to fare better than those who didn’t, they didn’t seem all that interested. 

Too bad.

But, I reluctantly decided, in the spirit of “The people who show up at business meeting are FMC,” the handful of people  expected could represent the larger community, right? The May 24th event could be symbolic. So Saturday afternoon, David * set up twenty chairs in a circle in the spacious Friends Room, I arranged food and flowers, and then we waited for the first arrivals, braced, I think, for a lackluster event.

Close to forty people came! And rather than eat and shmooze, these lovely souls immediately sat down in the ever-expanding circle in “expectant waiting.” 

Here’s the unexpected part: David has read the book more than once yet cried several times during the reading. In the years leading up to this book’s publication, I have read and reread Susan Lloyd Mc Garry’s poem, “Empire,” which introduces Chapter 10, countless times. Hearing her read it at the reading (Thanks again, Susan Lloyd) made me cry, however, as if I’d never before been moved by her powerful and deeply felt poem. When I read  a little piece re Patricia Watson, more tears. After the reading, friends/Friends reported they’d cried, too.

I’d thought this reading was supposed to be an opportunity to thank FMC for all its love and support. But what it actually turned out to be was an opportunity for me to be reminded of something essential, something fundamental, something very, very deep.

So, once again, thank you, FMC.    

* David Myers, “my L.L. Bean outfitter, my guide and companion every step of the way,” is my wonderful husband.

Backstory: When, about a year ago, I decided to self-publish, that decision seemed completely in line with the whole “leading” idea, i.e., trying to be faithful to what Spirit seemed to be asking of me. If I believed in what I was doing, why should I wait for some publishing company to fall in love with Way Opens? Why not actually invest in this project? (Maybe I’ll say more about this decision some other time.)

Happily, luckily, fortuitously, Warwick House Publishers, a self-publishing company, is located right in Lynchburg, Virginia, where much of Way Opens takes place. So for the past year, working closely with Warwick’s incomparable Joyce Maddox, I’ve been focused on getting this book into shape: seemingly-endless copy editing (I think Joyce combed the manuscript five times!), securing permissions from poets, making decisions about layout, getting the cover designed, etc., etc. Engrossing and endless details, thousands of them.

And, I have to say, for the most part it’s been an enormously satisfying process. Like getting to decide that the chapter notes immediately follow their respective chapter. Joyce, who is strictly Chicago Manual of Style, tried to talk me out of it. But I felt that this book is telling the story of a long, long (yet absolutely fascinating, of course) process and that readers need to be able to follow along. 

And how many authors get to have a say about their book cover? How many authors are actually thrilled with their book cover? I did; I am. Totally.

So, to wrap up this backstory, this enormously satisfying process suddenly became terrifying when, about a month ago, Joyce e-mailed that the printer wanted to know where to ship the books.

As my homeless students would say when they suddenly made some connection: “Oh, yeah, huh?” Doing my “homework,” writing several drafts, getting the manuscript the way I wanted; all that was leading up to, not “my book,” but books! In cartons. Lots of them. Coming to my house! Yikes.

So in the past month I have been doing everything I know to get the word out about Way Opens. (The “Doing It Yourself: Promoting Your Own Book or Project on a Tight Budget” workshop at this year’s Women, Action & the Media conference was hugely helpful!) I’ve had lots of help: My sister, Deborah Wild, for example, up-to-her-ears busy with her consultant biz,  designed the one-sheet. And dear, patient Nathan, who has so gently taught technophobic moi how to navigate the website world.

“I have nine-hundred books in my library,” Thoreau said, according to my friend Bob Irwin. “Seven-hundred of them I wrote myself.”

So, yeah, while the cartons stacked on top of each other in the upstairs hallway is a little daunting, shall we say, I am cheered by an e-mail I received from someone who’d been forwarded an e-mail from someone who’d. . . This many-times-over-forwarded e-mail, I suspect, is the one I sent out in a moment of utter panic a couple of weeks ago, to just about everyone I know, telling them about Way Opens. “This book sounds GREAT,” a total stranger wrote me this morning.

Way opens, right? 

Friday, September 26th, Friends Meeting at Cambridge (MA), 7:30pm, sponsored by Friends for Racial Justice (Follows potluck)

Sunday, October 19th, Bedford (MA) Unitarian-Universalist Church, 9:00 am.

Saturday and Sunday, November 15th and 16th, Hanover (NH) Quaker Meeting: a workshop. (Dates not yet conformed)

To learn more, to receive copy of queries, or to arrange such a discussion, please e-mail: wildwoman@mindspring.com

Friday, September 5, 8 pm, Dire Literary series at Out of the Blue, 106 Prospect St., Cambridge.

Thursday, October 9th, 8pm Unitarian-Universalist Church, Lynchburg, VA